Argentina 2-1 Jamaica - Bad vibrations, mon!

I had to watch this game. I don't know exactly why, but I thought I had to watch it. If anything, to do one of the things I love most: scream at the TV and criticize everyone who speaks or anything I see.

And I had plenty of reasons to do what I love most! It was a game that was tailor-made for that.

Then I found myself thinking and got to one conclusion: MARADONA is like a violent father.

I'm not WUI (writing under the influence). Let me explain what's my reasoning behind this.

A violent father will often say he loves his children and that he'll do anything for them. In some cases they would even go as far as to saying they are beating their children for their own good. When in reality, in every one of those cases, they know nothing about how to educate their children. In reality, they are not capable of being in that position and everything they do is wrong. Even when they don't mean to do wrong.

I have no doubts MARADONA loves our national team. He gave us enough proof of this in his playing days and also when he was a celebrity fan, but he is beating the hell out of the Albiceleste in every step he takes as a manager.

In another pathetic, almost horrifying display, Argentina defeated a VERY weak Jamaican team that included an amateur player and in order to do that, we needed more than 90 minutes to do so. As a matter of fact...Argentina were trailing until the 80th minute! Not to mention the blatant penalty that was not given to Jamaica in the first half.

Now we've got to get ready for an avalanche of idiotic journalists praising Martín PALERMO, who was awful and only scored thanks to some of the worst defensive displays I can remember and certainly because this Jamaican goalkeeper could have played without his hands and would have made no difference at all.

So-called pundits who undoubtedly have a hidden agenda and keep praising MARADONA (so Diego then gives them the exclusive interview, of course!).

Argentina scored twice in the last five minutes of the game. And the goals came after a fluky header from PALERMO and a goal-mouth scramble in which Jamaica's keeper tried to catch a butterfly in the area instead of keeping his eyes on the ball. Ignacio CANUTO the scorer.

Of course nobody will speak about how horrible this Jamaican keeper was. The first proof of this came in the very commentary of the game on TyC Sports. "PALERMO is the kind of natural born goalscorer that we don't have elsewhere in Argentina!" said one of those dinosaurs commentating the game. It doesn't matter if the guy is slow as a stoned turtle. He plays for Boca and his life has been like a movie script (HAS BEEN being the key words). That's enough to cement his place in our once very strong national team.

For the first time in my life I found myself actively rooting for an Argentina defeat. And I'm not ashamed to admit it. Why? Because I want what's best for the national team and what's best right now is to avoid any kind of validation of the mess MARADONA is doing with Argentina.

He was celebrating the goals like they were important. The look in his eye was that of a man who doesn't seem to realize what the situation is really like. A man who doesn't seem to understand that this was a VERY WEAK Jamaican side playing in Argentina and at times dominating the home side (which on a very different note showcased a very nice navy blue away shirt. Possibly the only outstanding thing about this game).

And that's all that MARADONA does during the game. 15 months since he was appointed and I NEVER (NEVER EVER EVER!) saw him or any of the members of his coaching stuff, give the players any kind of tactical direction or orders. He just stands there and says nothing other than: "Vamos, vamos" (come on, come on!).

True managers don't get excited about scoring two goals against this Jamaican side. True managers just think about how the team or some players work. That's what could have matter about this meaningless game. Apparently not to Diego, who is now talking about Fabián MONZON as if he was Ashley COLE and a young Paolo MALDINI put together, when he had NOBODY to mark and enjoyed the kind of liberties he won't enjoy against any decent opposition.

Football is not an exact science (that's one of the beauties of it), but having a (dis)organization like this will most likely complicate or even eliminate any chances we have to progress to the later stages at the World Cup.

It could happen, because I know of a guy who has been struck by lighting SEVEN TIMES in his life and survived.

If you ask me right now, the only chance we've got to win the World Cup in South Africa is if something like THIS was to happen to all the other teams in the tournament.

We are now officially doomed when it comes to knowing that Martín PALERMO is practically a certainty in the World Cup squad as the arm-band and the many hugs he shares with MARADONA show. "PALERMO is 80% guaranteed in my World Cup squad. He needs to keep his good level at Boca. PALERMO is necessary to me".

The only problem is that we won't be facing a team as weak as this Jamaican side in South Africa.

Right now, I can't take these thoughts off my head. I close my eyes and all I see MARADONA coming straight at me and forcing me to eat all my vegetables under threat of punishing me with more horrible images like those I've watched tonight.

He's coming to beat me and I'm too small to fight back...